How it works
Three steps to a healthier eternity
Take the audit
Ten questions, one per commandment. Our actuaries convert your answers into a personal damnation risk score.
Rebalance by confession
Every confessed sin is written off your ledger in full. Standard tier is free; premium tier is heard by the Founder himself.
Compound with candles
Small recurring deposits of light. Each candle that burns a full minute trims five points off your exposure.
Complimentary damnation audit
Your soul portfolio
Damnation risk assessment
Outstanding liabilities
No outstanding sins on file. Your ledger is clean - an enviable position on this market.
Portfolio rebalancing
Choose your confessor
· connected · the Founder is listening ·
· confessional open · Father Gabriel is listening ·
The chapel
Light a candle
60s of grace remaining
✓ Blessed Hand active - your candle is held upright
Comparative theology desk
The faith funds prospectus
Ten major positions. Estimated damnation exposure per our proprietary actuarial model, projected against your current ledger. Past performance of any deity is not a guarantee of future results.